How Did You Find That Untagged Post From 11 Months Ago a story of confusion, fear, and general unease
*dentist slaughters family in front of you*
they’re bleeding because you don’t floss
I was at walmart the other day, and I was sitting on a bench waiting for my mom to pay, and I was braiding my hair because that’s something I do when I’m bored, and this dude walks by and says, “hey baby, what else can you do with your hands?” I gave him my most polite smile and said in the sweetest way possible, “strangle you.”
And I think I actually scared him because his eyes got kind of wide and he just walked away.
why are replies so complicated now Jesus
I do not know, my child. But when you find out, tell me.
I will, accurately depicted Jesus.
any negative thing that can happen about yahoo buying tumblr is worth the “david karp daddy” jokes stopping
how sure are you about that
vomits on everything
my mom asked why i don’t read as many books as i used to and i just said it was because i read a lot of unpublished stories from independent writers online and she thinks that’s very good of me to give undiscovered authors a chance
i just read gay porn
Whenever my friend says goodnight to me on Skype he sends me this gif
and I wanted to send it to him tonight so I went to Google “black man turning off lamp” but Google autofill changed it to “black man turning into jet” and I got this
Long story short it’s 1am and I’ve been laughing at this for approximately 20 years